Lizard death and the death of an evil plan....

Lizards are the scariest creatures in the whole world. They're icky and cold and I think they're ugly with they're slightly translucent skin and unblinking eyes. OOOOOH! Just thinking about them give me the creeps. So, anyway, on Saturday, after I finishing my blog entry I decided I wanted to watch a movie before going to sleep. I have this sofa bed in my room and I always move it so it faces in front of the computer when I want to watch a movie that I downloaded. Ok, so I was pulling the sofa away from the wall when suddenly there was this quick movement behind it. I stopped. I moved back a little. Then, I glanced behind the couch. There it was in all its disgusting glory, stuck on the wall, the most brazen lizard in the world. I let out a slight shriek. This was 2 in the morning so no one could here my horror because they were all asleep, thus, no one came to my rescue. I couldn't do anything in my room anymore because my herpetophobia is so great so I ran out. "I'll sleep in the living hall I thought." but I thought wrong! my sister had fallen asleep watching tv outside and so I couldn't! I wanted to die! This meant that I had to sleep in my room anyway with the freaky thing. I was horrified! I was scared! I was omg-ed! I was getting angry... Really angry in fact. I never kill anything bigger than a fly usually because I always think that things bigger than flies have consciousness and don't deserve to be killed. But this lizard really made me mad because it just stayed there when I tried to scare it away. It was so brazen and stubburn that it made me really really really angry and before I knew what I was doing I had grabbed the can of bug spray I keep it my room. I stood on the couch and bent my body back far away so it couldn't jump on me and I sprayed with all I had. SHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Went the bug spray. And with a rustling noise the lizard ran behind the computer! I was like "SHIT!". Now its found itself a nice hiding place in my room and it might tell all its friends about it and soon behind my computer will be a lizard haven! I didn't want that. Bare in mind that this was 2 in the morning so my judgement had turned a little bit cloudy. I was really tired after all. So, I sprayed some more behind the computer I sprayed and I sprayed and I sprayed. After about 30 seconds of spraying I saw at the corner of my eye the brown skinned thing crawl out from behind the computer and run under my study desk. I proceeded to spray there also. It then made a dash for behind the dustbin at which I continued spraying at. It started to jump and jump and jump trying to crawl up the walls but the bug spray had impeded its crawling power and it couldn't then, it made a dash for the toilet. I followed bug spray in my wake. Pretty soon the flooor was covered with a shiny oily layer of bug spray. The thing ran for the toilet bowl and hid behind it. I didn't want to wake up the next morning to bathe in a toilet with a lizard, probably with impaired sticky power on the ceiling above my head ready to fall at any time, so, I continued my spray quest every moment getting more and more sadistic. I was sitting on the sink trying to avoid the creature when I realised that bug spray wasn't working fast enough. I looked around and saw my Veet hair removal gel. Ok, Veet is really really bad for my skin. It gives me strong chemical burns every time I use it so I stopped. The can I had left in my toilet had not been used in years. Without thinking much I grabbed it, aimed the nozzle over the lizard which was beneath the sink and let go a stream of strongly alkaline gel all over the lizard. It started to jump and squirm. At this point I realized what a monster I had turned into but it was too late the lizards skin had already been scalded and there was no turning back. The poor thing continued squirming and then it tried to crawl away for safety but the cream was all over it. I wanted to cry because I had caused so much pain so such a poor defenseless creature that I now realized did not deserve it. It was probably minding its own business behind my couch looking for a mosquitoe or something when I came along and decided that it should die. It was horrible! I wanted to speed up its inevitable death in some dignified way. A looked around the toilet for something to do just that and I found this bottle of rubbing oil, the type people use when they have stomach aches and headaches. Its really mentholly and I thought that a creature that small would die immediately after having some poured over it so, I poured alot of the oil all over the lizard. It started to jump even higher than it did before obviously feeling the burn from the ointment. It scrambled and it squirmed and then it crawled behind the door and died. I was sad and scared all at the same time. Sad because the poor thing had died at my hands and scared because I had turned into a sadistic lizard killing monster. I couldn't sleep in my room any more that night because of that incident so I collected all my pillows and blanket and stuff and slept on the floor of the living room.

I was feeling bad about Saturdays incident all through Sunday but today something happened to alleviate my mood. Remember that I have to take my sister to the Backstreet Boys concert? Well, I was thinking of ways where I could take care of her and still have fun there but I could come up with nothing so, at dinner I decided to discuss it with her. Half way through my rice I looked at her and said something along the lines of "I really hope you listen to me while we're at the concert," I was about to continue when my dad asked when the concert was being held. My sister was about to say something but then stopped. I told him it was Wednesday night. He started to smile at my sister sneakily. Then he looked at my mother. "She can't go," he said. "She's got tuition,". My mother stared open mouthed at my sister. I started to laugh. My sisters face contorted into something inhumanly angry. My mother was all "YOU TRIED TO TRICK US?!!!" I was all "HAHAHAHA" and dropped my fried chicken. My sister looked dismayed as her evil plot to get out of tuition was ruined. No wonder she wanted to go eventhough she doesn't like the Backstreet Boys. She just wanted to skip tuition! She really is a sneaky little thing isn't she? I'm actually quite proud of her. So now I don't have to worry about taking care of her at the concert anymore, I have to worry about selling the tickets otherwise, I'll have to go with my mother to the concert which isn't that bad on the count of I don't have to take care of my mother but it sure will be embarassing if she comes!

Backstreet Boys + Sister

On thursday I went rock climbing with my bosses son. It was fun. I went to the rock climbing gym at One Utama and met him there and he signed me in and stuff. Since it was my first time I had to only pay 12 bucks (YAY) then we climbed some stairs to where the climbing walls were. Golly were they daunting! There were some that were sloped inwards and there were some that had pieces hanging off in 90 degree angles that you had to climb over and there were some that jutted in and out and there was this one that wasn't even a wall it was more like a mountain surface. I was like "Ok... I don't want to do this anymore." But I didn't say anything because I was shy and I didn't want to look or sound or be even remotely related to a chicken. We met this shortish guy upstairs and he taught me how to tie knots and safety stuff which wasn't very fun (grr safety is boring! I live on the edge!). After that my bosses son and the shortish guy let me climb this wall which was slanted outwards. I was scared. My heart pounded really hard as I grabbed onto the wall. "Climbing" I said and waited for my belayer, whom I can't remember who it was to say "Climb on" which would be the go to start my horrific almost insane ascent. After what seemed like forever I heard someone say the words and I was like "Ok, here goes nothing!". I grabbed on to some rocks and pulled myself up. Before I knew it I was climbing up that wall like a lizard! I was like "WOW! I'm so cool!" I got to the top and my friends were like "Yeah!" and I was like "That was easy, lets do something harder!" Then they told me what a trail was. Its when you are only allowed to use one colour to climb. Which means if there are like 100 rocks on the wall all of different colour, you're only allowed to use one colour to help you climb all the way to the top. I was taken to another wall which had a vertical incline and was asked to do the yellow trail. It was easy and I made my way up really fast also. Then they gave me the most horrid colour of all... GREEN!!!! I used to like green because Tommy from Power Rangers was the Green ranger and he was kinda cute. But now... after that horrid experience with the green trail on that evil wall I do not like green. It was so hard! I kept falling off and getting really really frustrated. The climb to the top of the green trail was relatively easy until the last part where you had to reach for the last rock. It was this really small piece of idiotic green thing that was really really far away. I had to step on this really small other green rock and push myself up to reach it. It was SO HARD!!!! I kept slipping off as I reached for that rock! I fell off the wall again and again and again and again and again. It got to a point where I was so frustrated I nearly cried. Then, I managed to gather all my stregth and somehow I leaped off the small rock I was stepping on and I reached the top green one. The feeling of success was intense! I was sweating! I hate to sweat! The testosterone was rushing through my blood like F1 cars. The rush was ultra terriffic! My friends lowered my down from the top and I was ecstatic. I high fived them and we took pictures and everything. They thought I was really chun on the count of they couldn't do any of what I did on their first try or so they said. Then they took me to the mountain wall. I was like "are we really going to climb that?". Yes, we really were. and I managed to climb half of it too. It was really hard as well harder than the green trail and because it was a really rocky surface I got scraped all over my left hand and my finger nails were all scratched up. The whole experience was extremely fun though eventhough it was really really hard. I think I'll be going back again but not anytime soon since I won't get a discount anymore on the count of it won't be my first time anymore the next time I go. When I got home I was too tired to watch American Idol all the way and I fell asleep after the fat black girl who wasn't very good sang.

Today, me, my mum and my sister went to One Utama as usual per our Saturday outing trips and I told my mum that the backstreet boys were coming for a concert on Wednesday. I had just read about it a few days back. None of my friends want to go. I don't understand why! The Backstreet Boys were one of the hottest things in the 90's. The 90's were our era. The decade in which we grew up. Shouldn't we pay homage to our youth by going to the concert of one of the greatest things we grew up with? I don't know. Maybe my mentality is just different from theirs. But seriously! One of my friends excuse is "Its on a weeknight."! For goodness sake! Almost all concerts are on weeknights! They're only going to be here for one day! The boyband that played a major part in entertaining us when we were growing up. The boyband that gave us such timeless hits like Larger Than Life and I Want It That Way. I mean come on! That is so lame! Anyway, it was the biggest mistake me telling my mother about the concert. "I want to go!" my sister said suddenly. At once my mother said "If you're going, you have to bring your sister." My sister!!!!!!! I argued, I pleaded, I said "no" but all to no avail. I was stuck with the little monster. Why does she have to tag along everywhere I go? Can't she make her own friends? She's so pathethic! She doesn't even like the Backstreet Boys! Its so not fair! How am I supposed to be having fun when I have to babysit her? Hello? Newsflash! Babysitting does not equal fun! And I really want to have fun at this concert. I just have this weird feeling that its going to end up like our trip to Tokyo Disneyland where I had to plan everything and cue up and be stressed and all that while all my sister did was insist that she had to have this box of pop corn with Stitch on it that she doesn't even play with anymore now. She'll be having all the fun (not as much fun as I would have though if she weren't coming, on the count of SHE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE THE BACKSTREET BOYS) and I'll be all "NICOLE!!! NICOLE!!! WHERE ARE YOU!!!!!!??????". And to make things worse the concert is going to be free standing! I'm going to be dealing with things like "Koko I want to go toilet" and "Koko its so loud I want to go to the back", "Koko I'm tired I want to sit down" and an infinite amount of other irritating nonsense which I don't want to deal with at a concert, especially a Backstreet Boys concert. I'm so angry! I should have kept my mouth shut. So in the end, we went downstairs to the basement after a heated arguement and bought 2 tickets. One for me and one for HER. DAMN!!!!!!!!!

After that dreadful afternoon we went to my mothers friends house for dinner. She had prepared Nepalese food with her porter friend from Nepal who had just come down to Kuala Lumpur to work. The food was so so not good but not bad either. I had a lot though because, how often do you get nepalese food in Malaysia? After dinner me and my mum and my sister went to the living room where we met this lady whose name was Linda. Linda was really cool. We talked for a while and then my mums friend, the owner of the house showed us her karaoke set. That was it. We started singing and we never stopped. We just kept going and going and singing and singing. Me and Linda sang and sang and sang. My sister only sang one song - Eternal Flame, and she sang it really badly. She kept singing low notes when the "is this burning an eternal flame" part came on. It was really annoying and embarassing because being the music enthusiaist that I am, its shameful to have a sister who doesn't even know how Eternal Flame Goes. I bet she doesn't know any of the Backstreet Boys songs of the 90's. She sucks bigtime and I'm really irritated by her right now. I hope she does something wrong and gets punished in these three days so I can sell her ticket to maybe some friend who wants to go and appreciates the Backstreet Boys as much as I do, and go with that person instead. I'm so mean... I hope she isn't a burden during the concert otherwise I'll be even meaner. Anyway, after the night was over I found out that Linda is going for salsa classes at Havana too. Which means I'll be seeing her tomorrow at salsa class. YAY!

Actually I don't hate my sister. I love her. We both are actually quite close but she's just so young and having me a 19 year old take care of her at a concert is just dangerous and silly. My mum is terrified that we'll end up like her and her siblings - they aren't very close, but I think its obvious that we won't. Why try and force her into every activity that I'm doing? I get really annoyed by that sometimes. Like for example, I'm going to my friends birthday party, my mum will quip "can you bring your sister?". I'll be all "No! They're my friends not hers I don't want to take care of her at a party." to which my mum will respond "But she's quite mature all your friends will love her" but I don't want my friends to love her, they're MY FRIENDS, if she wants to go to parties with friends she should get her own, so at this point I usually rush out of the house. Plus I don't want to be responsible for anyone at a place where I'm supposed to be having fun. It just takes the fun out of being at a fun place. THIS SO SUCKS COCK and not in a good way either!

RASUAH!!!!

Yesterday, my auntie (Ps Su Ann: this is the auntie your mum isn't very fond of) called me in the middle of chemistry lab period to ask me to go for this AIA talk. I was half way through titration and I was reaching the end point when my pocket started to vibrate and then Britney Spears' "Piece Of Me" came on. I was like "SHIT!!!' and loosened the burette tap too much. The chemical started pouring out of the nozzle. I didn't know what to do. I was torn between picking up the phone and turning off the stream of disaster spouting from the equipment. I picked up the phone, then I reached for the burette. Just then the solution I was titrating turned pink. I was like "AAAAAAAAAAAH!". Then it turned dark pink, and I knew that it was too late to save the failed experiment. The sodium hydroxide in the burette was running into the now syruppy substance and I stared dismayed. The auntie asked me over the phone as I stepped out of the lab that I was to meet her at her house at 6 and she would take me and her son to the AIA office where the talk was being held. I said "Sure!"

At 5.30 I made my way to the auntie's house. It was somewhere in Damansara Utama. I thought I knew where it was, but I was wrong... It wasn't where I thought it was so, I drove around DU for about an hour until I remembered where it was. It turns out it was at the opposite end of where I was looking, near the kindergarten. The area was horribly jammed up at the time and I was pretty frustrated by the time I got to her house. I was really late but when I told her that I had gotten lost she laughed.

By the time we got to the AIA building I had made friends with the aunties son and he invited me to go rock climbing. We went upstairs and after we parked the car and there were refreshments prepared for us. I being the greedy person that I was at a whole lot and broke my diet plan of the day which was supposed to be less than 1000 calories by eating 4 pieces of cake and 3 curry puffs (I am such a pig). The talk wasn't anything I hadn't heard before. It was this introductory talk for people about to take the insurance exam. I talked to this malay girl and from UITM and she asked me to do this survey about some islamic insurance company that I can't remember the name of. I also talked to these other two chinese girls who were agents themselves and they said that I had the makings of a good agent. I was like "Good!" since insurance is my back up plan if engineering doesn't work out for me in the end. After the talk my auntie drove us back to her place where I had parked my car before that.

I drove off to Taman Tun after that to pay my salsa class fees on the count of the instructors have this thing about paying their fees late and I had forgotten to pay them on Sunday (the day I was supposed to pay) and they called me. After I payed, I drove back. This is where the RASUAH incident begins. You see, near the Secret Recipe there is this traffic light where people usually make illegal U turns so they don't have to drive really far to make a legal one. It was dark and I didn't see the bunch of police squad cars at the other side of the road. Before I knew it had made the U turn and a police man was flagging me down. I was like "Great!".

I was really nervous. I didn't know what to do and I wound down the wrong window. I quickly corrected my error and I and the police man had a conversation that went sort of like this:

Me: Hi, ada masalah?
police: Awak buat illegal U turn.
Me: Ya kah? So sekarang macam mana? (sad and confused look)
police: I bagi awak saman la!(laughs)
Me: Ok... (I was thinking "OH SHIT!!!!" at this moment)
police: Awak benar nak saman?
Me: Jika saman, I perlu bayar berapa?
police: RM250 atau 300
Me: Oh (I also thought "OH SHIT!!!!!" at this point)
police: So awak benar nak saman?
Me: Bagilah (sad)
police: Benar?
Me: (getting the message) Jika tak saman macam mana?
police: Awak fikirlah! (laughing)

Honestly he sounded like a nice guy. He was very jovial and not rude or mean.

Me: Oh! Bang nak berapa? (lifting up wallet)
police: Janganlah tunjuk tunjuk macam tu!
Me: Sorry... I tak ada banyak wang la sekarang. I student sahaja
police: bagilah apa yang awak ada

I handed him an RM10 note and showed him the rest of my empty wallet. He took it and pretended to write something on a pad and then he let me go. This was the first time I bribed a police man. My mother laughed when I told her and said that I was lucky that I got away with paying such a small sum. I am thankful.

Visiting Part 2

Aaaaah! Another hard day of visiting is at its end. Today we went to my 4th and second aunties houses. I thought I was in for another barrage of "Why you so thin ar?" again but I was wrong. I was happy. I was telling my parents in the car "Hah see! None of these people think I'm thin! Neh neh neh neh neh!". It was wonderful. For a while at least. Then, my cousin asked my parents at my second aunty's house "Eh, why is he suddenly so thin ar?". I was like "Damn it....". My parents were like "haha! we knew they were all thinking it!!!!". I was like "....". After all that nonsense, we went to my fathers aunty's house where they kept calling me engineer on the count of I told them I was studying engineering. Then we went home. I bathed, and then like an hour later my cousins came to the house with their kids. I played parcheesi with them. It was fun. The youngest son of one of my cousins has also grown thin. He's like 7. He used to be chubby and cute. Now he's like this thin menace. He used to be a cute chubby menace. Now he's not. He couldn't sit still the whole time we were playing. But seriously he's more well behaved than a lot of other kids so I think I shouldn't be calling him a menace. Ok. I take back the parts above where I called him a menace. He still is quite cute also, only less cute than he was before.

I'm the highness!

Yesterday, I and my family went for dinner at The Curve. You see, last night was the night reunion dinners are usually held (the night before Chinese New Year) but since we had an early reunion dinner the night before with the rest of the family(my grandparents, my aunty and uncle, and stuff) we didn't have anyone to have dinner with on the night of reunion dinners. On the count of we didn't want to have a plain old dinner at home, we decided to have dinner out. We went to this restaurant where they served German style food and we ordered this set with lots of German meat like veal sausage and stuff, and my mum and I being the wonderful alcohol lovers that we were decided to order a bottle of wine. "Yay! Wine!" I thought.

We ate and ate and I ate a lot. I also had lots of wine. Lots and lots of wine. I had like maybe 5 glasses. My dad after we had ordered the wine decided that he wasn't going to have more than 1 glass and in the end, didn't finish his glass. So me and my mum finished most of the bottle. My sister who is 12 had 2 glasses also. As a result of drinking so much, we were all really really tipsy after dinner, even my dad who I discovered cannot hold his alcohol very well. My mum was quite high and suddenly had a craving for ice cream so, we all walked to Tesco which was just across from the Curve to get our ice cream. We bought like a tub each of really cheap walls ice cream and I had cookies and cream flavour. It was so funny because we looked like this family of drunks walking around Tesco looking for ice cream. Then we went to the car. I had driven everyone to the curve in my car but I was feeling too woozy to drive so I asked my dad to drive. Just as we finished paying at the parking payer machine thing my mum recieved this call and after that she kept laughing and laughing. We were all like "whats wrong?". It turned out that we had forgotten to pay for dinner and the waiter had just realised. My mum had a reservation at the restaurant before so he got her number and called us. It was so stupid! We had to drive all the way out of the Curve since we had already paid for the parking and had only 10 minutes to get out of the parking lot before the ticket expired. So we drove all the way out and then drove to the entrance of the Curve where my dad had to park, get out of the car, walk all the way to the restaurant and pay for dinner. It was like this weird drunken adventure!

When we got home I was like really really whoa and decided to watch some family guy on my computer. I randomly picked two episodes which I had downloaded and watched them both forgetting completely about the ice cream. After that I went to sleep. I woke up 3 hours later and it was about 3 a.m.. I remembered the ice cream and I was like "lets have some!". So I went downstairs and took out my cookies and cream from the freezer and brought it to my room. I had pushed the sofa bed in my room in front of the computer so I could watch Family Guy on the computer more comfortably and had turned it into a bed. I suddenly felt like watching How I Met Your Mother so I did since I had also downloaded a few episodes on my computer. I watched like 1 episode and in that episode finished the whole 500ml tub of cookies and cream. I felt piggified and not sleepy so I watched more episodes until I was too tired to watch anymore and then I went back to sleep.

I woke up and it was 9 30 a.m. and it was Chinese New Year! I was like "OK! Lets bathe!". So I took a bath and then I put on my new clothes. I was extremely excited about my new Levi's jeans that I had bought a week ago. They like fit me really really well and I think they look gorgeous. So I put them on and found this cool shirt my mum bought for me, its brown. I put that on sprayed on some perfume and went downstairs where my mum and dad gave us Ang Pao's (red packets filled with cash usually given to unmarried people on Chinese New Year). We were in for a long day of visiting (during the Chinese New Year celebrations which last about a month people visit their relatives and friends to say hi and stuff) ahead of us.

First we went to my grandmothers house where we met a bunch of aunties and uncles who kept telling me that I "lost so much weight la!!!" and asking "are you anorexic?". It was quite amusing. Then we went to this other aunties house to visit my grandfathers sister who is bedridden because she has diabetes. I don't think she remembers us anymore being that she is so sick. Then we went to my grandfathers sisters house (even though she died more than 10 years ago). I guess we went there to see my fathers cousins. They're this pair of ladies one is divorced and one is married but her husband is never around. Lately the son of the one with the husband has been going through a dog craze. There were like 5 dogs in the house. It smelled so icky! After that we went to my mothers eldest sisters house (my mother has 5 sisters and 2 brothers.) Then we went to her eldest brothers house. Everyone kept asking me why I was so thin and telling me to put on weight. By this time I was not ammused anymore. Then because it was dinner time, we went back home.

I'm feeling quite happy because I've collected alot of money, but I am also feeling quite irritated that people think I'm too thin. I'm not too thin. In fact I think I'm quite not thin. I should put on some muscle so I don't look too thin.

Attend The Tale of Sweeney Todd!

Today was one of those days in which I didn't feel like doing anything productive at all. Yesterday I kept telling myself that I should study today on the count of I'm incredibly far behind in my studies. I should be finishing my revision of chemistry by now but I'm only a quarter of the way through my textbook. I woke up at 11 and I was like "I must study now!" but I didn't and instead I turned on the TV and watched E! for about an hour. Then I was like "I should be studying now!" again, but I didn't. I went to my room and sat in front of the computer and realised that I had finished downloading the stage recordings of Sweeney Todd and Into The Woods. So I watched them both 2 times each. I watched Into The Woods twice even though I'd seen it more than 7 times already! I don't know why I did it. I just wanted to not do anything beneficial today. I tried about 3 times to exercise but everytime I did I'd stop in the middle of my workout before I could break a sweat because I didn't feel like sweating. And I kept putting off studying. I feel so horrible and guilty. I really should study. I really really should. But the stage production of Sweeney Todd is so wonderful I really really want to watch it again even though I've seen it and the movie twice each already. Oh my God! I'm so lazy!

We had reunion dinner tonight at some restaurant near Paramount. It was fun. I talked to my cousin a whole lot and when the chicken dish came my grandfather who was really intent on serving me and his other grandchildren when we should be serving him accidentally gave me the chickens ass. I didn't know until I put it half way in my mouth and felt the triangular flap of skin which is the butt part on my lips and saw my father looking across the table mischeviously at me. Everyone laughed! It was so stupid! I spat it out and pushed it to the side of my plate. My auntie says that some people love it (the ass of the chicken) and they fight over it all the time. (Yux!)

Right now I don't know why but I'm feeling extremely into Enrique Iglesias. More than I'm usually into him. I feel like I want to do him with the Ping Pong Song playing in the background. I'm so horny.

"Do you know? Do you know? Do you Know?"

Hello!

Hi! This is my first post! Whee! Hello, hello hello! Nice of you to come by! Muaks! I blow you a kiss!